Thursday, March 19, 2009

PERPLEXED

**WARNING**
-content full with gibberish rambling-

They always say that the one who know you the most is yourself.
I'm starting to doubt that.

I really don't know myself now.
What kind of person am I?
Cruel? Cold? Funny? Selfish? Caring? Sociable?

The best person that can tell for sure would not be myself but someone who is close to me.
Now comes the question, who?
Who is that close friend who can tell me for sure what kind of person am I?
You know, I don't think there is. Really.

It is necessary to have that someone? I don't know.
Probably though coz I can't judge myself anymore. I don't know how to judge.

Now that SO MUCH had happen, I really don't know how to face reality and I dare not to commit the same mistake anymore. In the end, the loss outweigh the gain. Why bother losing? Might as well not starting it at the first place.

Maybe I was curious back then.
Maybe I was blinded.

Whatever it is, what is done is done and lessons had been learned. I just need a little more time to ponder. For all I know, times heals everything. Be it pain, suffering, sickness or hollowness.

And when everything is cool, that is when I will lose my guard. For now, I'm on guard, constantly reminding myself to not to think of anything silly and hoping for something stupid irrationally.

Until then, that one fine day, I will reflect on myself, and get to know anyone for an extended period of time before judging on that particular person. Before judging another person, you should judge yourself. So they said.

Therefore, judge thyself, though thy couldn't but thy could ask someone else.
Until that person comes into picture...

=(

Listening to
Kimi ni Aitakute


Album

Love Letter